Thursday, August 19, 2010

AROMA Party: Net Neutrality (Position Paper)

An important feature of the net is that it not restrict through traffic in any way that favors the traffic by type. This is a fundamental of net design and its applications to commercial enterprise. Restrictions on bandwidth are the core problem. Therefore the following has been established:

The issue of Net Neutrality with respect to bandwidth usage can be best resolved through standards for bandwidth. Therefore, the band cannot be so large as to enable dolphins or tuna to pass freely through the net, nor so small as to restrict the passage of minnows, coral reefers or other smoky cod not yet ready for harvesting.

Note: This resolution is not to be confused with broadband, a topic of some concern among 70’s girl bands such as Heart for whom bandwidth is a serious problem. The AROMA Party is insensitive to this issue.

ADDENDUM: The following resolution has been submitted by an AROMA Party member at large. The chair has it on good authority that he will no longer be at large shortly.

  1. Let it be moved that Aromatic is the Official Language of the Aroma Party since Aromatic is the language of common scents.

    • People! Wake up and smell the Kool-Aid! Join the Aroma Party!”

    • “Hey Snifter, can you paradigm?”

The Resolution Committee rejects Resolution 1 as

a) The term ‘aromatic’ is reserved as the name for AROMA Party memberships and the RC does not consider ambiguity a sensible state of affairs similar to South Carolina.

b) The role of Snifter is acceptable for those seeking a state of affairs but is reserved for the former Governor of the State of South Carolina and the former Governor of New York.

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